I received an IM from an unknown source today. Someone outside my Buddy List? Heavens, this could be a new friend! Someone to stay up late at night with, talking about all the details of the day, and finally sharing mys- oh. Nope. Just a porn spambot. This is the full conversation.
(02:47:58 PM) meganm182005: heya.
(02:48:46 PM) POPE: omg a bot
(02:48:53 PM) meganm182005: No i am far from a bot
(02:49:04 PM) POPE: how far
(02:49:11 PM) meganm182005: Hey what's up? 24/F here. You?
(02:49:16 PM) POPE: THATS NOT VERY FAR AT ALL
(02:49:24 PM) meganm182005: Hmm. Have we chatted before?
(02:49:32 PM) POPE: NO WE HAVENT BECAUSE YOURE NOT REAL
(02:49:42 PM) meganm182005: Oh sorrry. l wasnt sure. Butt anyways.. What r u up to?
(02:49:47 PM) POPE: Butt.
(02:49:55 PM) meganm182005: Ooo. Im like sooo bored.
(02:50:05 PM) meganm182005: Hey l got a idea. Ima get on my webcam. Do you wanna watch?
(02:50:21 PM) POPE: no
(02:50:26 PM) POPE: i dont
(02:52:03 PM) POPE: YEAH TAKE THAT, ROBOT.
This spambot gets points for trying to pretend that it’s not one. It really isn’t every day that you find a robot that tells you specifically that it is not a robot when you ask it. But at the same time it loses points for taking that about as far as a single IM before trying to turn my penis against my brain with its HAY I M 24 AND LADY, NAKED TIME? I can’t even really be sure that it actually knew I said anything about it being a bot, or the pornbot hacker industry is just trying to preempt me by assuming that’s the first thing I’m going to say every time. No, robot. I do not want to see you on webcam. It would only be a sham.
This pornspambot gets zero erections out of a totally broken conversation tree.